Birthday wrap up

Well, my friends, here I am a year older. The birthday party went well, and I want to give a shout out to all my friends who came out to see me and celebrate with me. It was a good evening!

Two of my favorite humans, W & J, gave me this really cool shirt. It reminds me of a Roy Lichtenstein piece of art - you know pointillism meets pop art. It says "Woof" on the back, which saves me having to say it myself, people can just read my shirt. They also gave me a necktie. I know some of you think of neckties as an instrument of torture and a means of "the man" controlling you. But I don't agree. I think its lends an air of sophistication to me, and really is exactly what I have been looking for.

So, with the gifts, the ladies serenading me and some new friend/maestro tickling the ivories, it was a good night indeed.

Sunday, although it is the real day that marks the start of my new life here, was quiet, almost uneventful. Unless you count the 93 minute international phone call I made. Well, it wasn't intentional for a start. Someone left me alone for a long time, and that same someone left the phone on the love seat right near the pillow I like to sleep on. Its not my fault that I belly dialed some foreign country and let them listen my abdominal noises for 93 minutes. So, you can imagine someone was not happy with me.

I am including a photo of myself in my new shirt and tie. The quality is not very good, but you will get the idea.

Until next time, always remember to give a little love, or is it, get a little love?
Clifford George

Tuesday - okay, I don't have a catchy title for today's post

Hello to all of you from a grey and gloomy Columbus. Where did the lovely spring weather go?

Another week is underway. But this is not just any week, this the last week of my ninieth year! Sunday, I celebrate my 91st birthday! I am determined to spend my last few days at this age doing some exciting things. And I have already gotten off to a good start.

Yesterday morning, on my morning walk, I managed to give the human the slip. It had been raining and I noticed a large muddy puddle up ahead, so I made sure I went to the opposite side of the puddle from her. I knew she would not want to step into the mud AND I knew she wouldn't yank my leash. So, after stretching as far as she possibly could, she had to let go of the leash - and I was off - running like a wild dog with her in hot pursuit! It was all rather amusing. There she was running after me, yelling - and you all know she can't really yell, and me running with the soundtrack of "Born Free" playing in my ears! Wish you could have been there!

She did finally catch up with me, or if truth be told, I slowed down so that she could catch up with me. By this stage the leash was wet and muddy. I got the lecture, of course... "you are just lucky we live in a quiet neighborhood! What if there had been a car coming..." Oh! Please, give me a break!

The excitement just carried on yesterday. Upon returning from our evening walk, my nemesis, Henry, the so-called dog who lives next door, managed to slip away as his human was trying to hook him up to his leash and he came running over. He is a young buck and he and I have been battling since I first moved in here. He will insist on challenging me! He just never learns that I am in charge. I had to once again show him a thing or two and his human got him suitably restrained. Someone ought to tell him that the new haircut does not help his image!

And that leads me to my haircut. I am scheduled for some Clifford pampering time tomorrow. I have to look my best for the big birthday party on Saturday. I, of course, will get a real Schnauzer cut and not some "cute puppy" style.

I hear that some one new is coming to the party, and he plays the piano! Hey, I hope he knows "Happy Birthday!" I can't wait to have my favorite ladies serenading me on my birthday!

Catch you soon
Clifford George

Pre-birthday ponderings

Well, the haircut went well, and I am, as my human likes to describe me, "devastatingly handsome." I am more than ready for my birthday on Sunday when I will celebrate my 91st birthday. Actually, like most dogs, I don't know when my real birthday is, but March 28 is the day we celebrate. Now some of you who know my human, may also know that March 28 is her birthday, and so, you may conclude that she just decided to keep things simple and make me share her birthday. But, there is nothing simple about my human and there is another reason that March 28 is the day chosen as my birthday.

March 28, 2008 is the day I came to live here. In fact all of us animals who live in this home celebrate our birthdays on the day we came to live here. Olive's day is March 14, and our dear brother, Mikey, was December 23 - a true Christmas gift!

Olive has been here the longest - even though she is the youngest! She has been here for three years, Mikey would have been here for 3 years this past Christmas, and I have been here for two years this Sunday. You see, we are all adopted, all rescues! So, in her complex way, the human has hit on something good. We may celebrate our birthdays on a day that really isn't our birthday, but we celebrate the start of our new lives, in fact, we celebrate life itself!

So, Sunday is indeed cause for celebration. I will be celebrating my new life and honoring all those who helped to get me here. Its been an interesting journey, and at times very painful and unpleasant, but the journey has led me to where I am today and to all of you. So, thank you! May your journey take you to wonderful places and to wonderful people. And lets always celebrate life.

Ciao!
Clifford George Jackson

If you would like to honor some of the people who helped rescue me (and Mikey and many others), you can make a donation to Schnauzer Rescue Cincinnati www.schnauzerrescuecincinnati.org. Just be sure to tell them that Clifford sent you!

Hello everyone,

Once again I have been barred from using the computer - this time you can blame the human's busy job. Now finally, I can sit down and catch up with all of you.

Not a whole lot has been going on in my life - get up in the mornings, have breakfast, read the newspaper, go for a walk... I read that some guy won the Iditarod for the fourth year in a row. I am not sure whether to be impressed or appalled. I guess its an accomplishment and the dude is a throat cancer survivor, but its not like he is pulling the sled himself. Its the dogs that do the work! Its times like this that I am so pleased I am not a husky or malamute or whatever other dogs get into that. I think that guy should come with a warning label to all "mushing" dogs - BEWARE OF LANCE MACKEY!!!!

Yesterday was St. Patrick's Day. I wish I could tell you that we had some fabulous celebration and drank lots of green beer, but the closest I got to green anything was the green beans in my food! My human really needs to get a life - she is really holding me back.

I have something else I want to get off my chest - I read about Sandra Bullock this morning and how her husband has had an affair. Honestly, I am getting really tired of these kinds of stories. Tiger Woods, John Edwards and now Sandra Bullock's husband! What is it with you humans? Doesn't being faithful mean anything anymore? Maybe you think its strange for a dog to talking about this? But dogs are experts at being faithful. We might not have wives or husbands or partners, but we are inherently faithful to all of you. Even when you don't deserve it! It seems like some of you think its "cool" to betray the ones you love, well, the way I see it, its way more "cool" to be faithful.

When you betray someone you love or claim to love, it is the ultimate act of selfishness and narcissism. And that is not cool! Some people say being faithful is boring, well, then get a hobby, and if its so bad then get out of the relationship, but don't cheat! At least you humans can get out of a bad relationship. As dogs we don't have that option. Even when the relationship is abusive we are mostly trapped, and still we are faithful.

I have known the pain of betrayal - yes, even Mr. Clifford knows this pain. And its taken me a long time to get over that. I had several humans help me get to where I am today. When I first got here, Mikey helped me to realize that I was safe and loved. More than anything Mikey taught me that if I learned to trust, I would open myself to so much happiness. He really showed me that being faithful to the ones you love, makes your life richer.

My human always says that Mikey came into her life to show her what pure joy is, and that I came into her life to show that you can trust again after you've been hurt. And that's why I am sticking around - she still has a lot to learn.

So, be cool
Clifford George Jackson

Its almost the weekend!

Well, hello to all of you!

Another week has flown by. Is that an indication that I am having a good time? They say time flies when you enjoying yourself. And I have been enjoying myself.

This week my human bought herself, or as she like to say "treated herself" to a new yoga DVD. And strangely enough it was not a Rodney Yee DVD. I was beginning to get concerned about her obsession with the human pretzel, Rodney Yee. This one is called "Warrior Yoga" and it features Sting's wife, Trudy somebody and some bendy Asian guy. I chuckled to myself as she watched it, this is going to be fun. And it has been fun! After watching the DVD she felt ready to try the moves herself. I watched her, I watched the DVD, was she even doing the same set of exercises? Yikes! That was no warrior! Although it was a little scary watching her!

I don't know what the big deal is about yoga. Maybe its because I already know how to do downward facing dog and upward facing dog. I don't need some DVD to learn that, I was born knowing that. And then relaxation pose - who has to learn to relax? Humans - you guys are certainly interesting.

On that note, I leave you with a true relaxation pose - a photo of my brother, Mikey, showing us all how its done.

Namaste!
Clifford George Jackson

Is that Spring I smell?

Hello again!

Can you believe the great weather we've had the past few days? Sunshine, and even, dare I say it, warm! Almost all the snow has melted and I can see the grass again and there are all sorts of new smells to discover. It does mean my walks take a lot longer. I have to check out every new smell I encounter and decide whether I want to anoint it.

We went for a walk this morning and encountered a small dog of dubious descent. He went crazy - barking, almost choking himself. I made sure I walked really, really slowly past his house, pausing to sniff and anoint, and ignoring him. That just made him even wilder. And then the best part was his human said to him, "Why can't you be good like him?" I love that. Mind games! Such fun!

The warmer weather also means that the cat is spending more time outside. I would love to know what she gets up to on her jaunts. She never tells, but alludes to the fact that I am missing out on some good times. Hey, what does she know? She's a cat! And a crazy cat at that. She came in yesterday, after being out for hours and then promptly gets into my bed and sleeps for about 3 hours! Lucky for her, I sleep on the love seat during the day!

Well, my friends, I believe a party is being planned to celebrate my birthday in a few weeks. I checked the guest list and gave my approval - all of them are on my favorite people list. I hear that there will be some other birthdays celebrated as well, but that's okay, I am happy to share the love. I wonder what gifts I will be getting?

Take it easy!
Clifford George Jackson

Hello my friends,

I apologize for the long delay in writing. I have been unable to access the computer due to my human having a rather debilitating virus. This has kept her in bed or on the couch for several days. And as she won't give me her password, I have been unable to communicate with you! What's with the secrecy? Its not like she is giving me the password to access her bank accounts.

I am pretty sure the cat knows the password and I tried to wrestle it out of her. She keeps insisting that just because she lies on the computer keyboard, runs across the keyboard, etc., doesn't mean she knows the password. I am not sure she is telling me the whole truth, but as she fully loaded with all her claws and not afraid to brandish them, I didn't push her too hard.

So, with the sick human there has not been a lot of excitement here. I have tried to be a little more attentive and lay on the bed with her, sat next to her on the couch, watched the Oscars, and I think I did a fairly good job of nursing her back to comparative health. She is still coughing and that really disturbs my sleep, but I will have to exercise patience with the patient! I give her credit for ensuring that someone took me for my walks. Here's a big shout out to W and J for taking me for walks! You are on my favorite human list.

Despite being busy brushing up on my nursing skills I have been giving some thought to what career I would follow (if I ever decided to). I definitely think nursing is out - long hours and not much reward.

I did think about acting. I think I am a natural, and watching the Oscar's last night I think I could do at least as well as any of those guys. George Clooney - really! Everyone swoons over him! Don't get me wrong, he's a pretty cool dude. But so am I - silver hair and a way with the ladies - Georgie boy, watch your back!

That got me thinking about the arts in general. I think I am a born performer and multi talented at that. To back up this claim I am including a photo of moi, playing the piano (incidentally the human is standing by to turn the pages). If I had to earn a living, and I pray that never happens, I think the performing arts might be the way to go.

I used to have this conversation with my brother, Mikey, before he passed away, and he always like the idea of being a cowboy, or joining the circus. I think he would have been really good at making people laugh. He made me laugh! That's a great gift to have and to share.

I hope you make someone laugh today and that someone makes you laugh too!
Best
Clifford George Jackson

Home again!

Hello my friends!

I am back home again after a few days of socializing at the vet. I know most of my canine pals baulk at the thought of spending time at the vet, but I usually have a grand time (unless of course I am ill, in which case I am just miserable).

I decided on the moose sweater, by the way, and I was right, the ladies loved it! Actually even the guys loved it. Several of the guys asked me where I bought the sweater. I gave them the 411. Gotta help the little guys!

The human is obviously home. She seems to have had a good time. She seems to think I really want to know all the details of her trip - where does she get that idea? She was rambling on about the hotel where she stayed. Apparently they have a "canine ambassador"! Likely story, or so I thought, until I checked it out. This hotel in Boston, The Fairmont Copley Plaza, does indeed have a canine ambassador - a black Labrador, named Catie Copley. Soooo predictable! She hangs out in the lobby to greet guests and then worse still she is available for guests to take her on walks. Honestly, Labradors are just such approval seekers. Dogs with jobs - whatever next?

Now I know some dogs are service dogs and good for them, but really, to work for no pay? A pat on the head? A "good boy"? A treat? I get all that and more without doing a thing, unless you count manipulating humans as work! Besides I don't know how people find time to work. I mean that would really interfere with my other activities.

If I had to choose a career, I wonder what that would be? I am talented in several areas so I would have many options. Hmm...I think this line of thought could be interesting. I will let you know what I come up with and let me know your thoughts on this too.

Talk to you soon

Clifford George Jackson

Hard at work!